Of Going About Things the Right Way
by Kyone
Summary: So it's Valentine's Day. And Roy wants to get something for Riza. Hopefully he won't mess up too badly. And who's Ed getting something for? (RoyRiza, Ed?)


Going About Things the Right Way

Roy was one of those people that didn't understand the female mind.

Between the miniskirt plans and the endless stream of dates, he never had the time to realize that he might be doing something wrong. The fact that his dates never lasted more than two weeks should have clicked.

At least he could _get_ dates, unlike a certain short alchemist, who, as far as Roy knew, never had a girlfriend.

But he was digressing. Anyway, being it February 13 (meaning it would be February 14 the next day), Roy figured he should be a gentleman and get something for a certain Riza Hawkeye. This could either be because he liked her or because she might get mad if he didn't get her anything.

So, he went out in search of something. He didn't know what he was searching for, but when he found it, he _knew_ it would be impressive.

After looking for some time, he sighed (perhaps a bit over-dramatically), causing a few young females to stare and give him googly eyes. This was not working the way he'd hoped.

It suddenly occurred to him that everyone else knew what they were doing (and correctly, for that matter).

It also occurred to him that Edward Elric was paying for a Valentine's Day gift at the moment.

Roy walked over to him and whacked him on the back. "Who's that for, Shorty?"

Ed turned, slightly perturbed. "The hell?"

"Who's it for?"

'That," Ed answered, turning a deep red, "is none of your business."

Roy smirked, allowing Ed to finish up at the counter, watching intently the whole time. Why would _he_ need chocolate?

Then an idea hit him at the same time as his open hand did (possibly out of self-thought stupidity).

He would, for what might have been the first time ever, take a leaf from Fullmetal's book. He could get Hawkeye chocolate! Sure, it wasn't the most _original_ idea, but it would do. Hey, it's chocolate!

So he bought a nice looking box and left, ignoring the young females' stares like before. Now, how to go about presenting the gift…

He thought about it all night, wondering what to say to the blonde (and rather dangerous) woman. After a few hours, he decided that "Happy Valentine's Day, Riza" worked well.

The next day, he woke, got ready, and left, an uncharacteristic spring to his step.

When he got to the lovely building that various State Alchemists called their second home, he noticed two things. One was that _someone_ had stuck pictures of Maes Hughes's daughter all over the walls. The other was that everyone who saw him was staring.

He ignored this, bravely making his way to Riza's office. He arrived after what seemed to be a whole lot longer than two minutes (the same phenomena was observed when Riza was very, very angry), took a deep breath, steeled his courage, and knocked.

"Come in," she said, not even looking up from her papers as Roy entered.

"Happy Valentine's Day." When Riza looked up and blushed, Roy took this as a good sign and continued. "I hope you like these."

As he held out the box of chocolates, Riza's blush deepened. "Colonel, I'm touched…" The happy chorus in Roy's mind started up. "But I'm afraid I don't eat chocolate."

The chorus cut off with a sour note. "Really?"

"Yes," Riza replied coolly. "And…I believe…you forgot something this morning."

Roy looked down with horror to discover that he'd forgotten his pants. 'Fullmetal, I hope you have the same bad luck as me,' he thought as he ran down the hall to various alchemists' whistles.

Meanwhile…

Edward Elric held out his own box of chocolates. "Happy Valentine's Day," he semi-mumbled.

Envy squealed and hugged Ed.

-

Completed 1.28.05

Hope you liked it. I don't own FMA, the normal stuffs. An amusing thing about spellcheck on my computer is that it's sexist. Seriously, it was listing things that were "gender-specific." No kidding. See the trouble I go through for my stories?

Yeah, so maybe Riza does eat chocolate. But I didn't see the Japanese version. I only read the manga up to Chapter…43. So I really wouldn't know. Ehehe…please review!

Kyone


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